© Copyright 2016 - Harry - Used by permission
Storycodes: Solo-M; Sbf; M/f; D/s; contract; 24/7; slave; tease; denial; sex; climax; video; cons; X
Part 3: Discoveries
Chapter 1: Lessons
When I got to Janicas house, she was already waiting for me, sitting at the front porch. I walked to her with uncertainty what was going to happen, or what she wanted to talk about. She looked a bit sad, and kept her gaze on the floor until I put my foot on the first step.
She stood up and came to hug me. Her grip held for some time, and when she finally let me go she said she was glad I came. Though I really didn´t hear that from her voice. Something was not right.
"Of course I would come. I was worried about you. Is everything ok?"
Janica replied "Let's get inside and get you that coffee first".
We went to sit to her kitchen and she poured for both of us. I just waited for her to start talking, but she seemed to be troubled. Like she didn´t know where to start. I had to break the silence. "You said there was something we needed to talk about...?" After couple moments of thinking, she started.
"Yes. And I have been thinking how to say this to you. My thoughts and emotions have been on a roller coaster since. At one point, they are climbing slowly up the hill, just to only come back down. Fast." I could see the tears in her eyes when she continued.
"When we were sitting on the bed, and I told you to leave, I was angry with you. Angry, shocked, scared... I felt you had betrayed me. My trust in you." I tried to say something, but she told me to wait until she had finished.
"Later that night, when I was lying on my bed, cursing your name and crying, I was sure I would never let you come inside this house again. Ever. You had crossed the line." She still kept her eyes on her coffee cup.
"But after sleeping over night, yesterday morning my feelings were totally different. Of course I remembered what had happened the night before, and it was the first thing on my mind. But when I laid on my bed, thinking back, how everything went, I started to feel the warmth growing inside me. My hands just went to my crotch and I started to masturbate. When I stuck my fingers inside my pussy and closed my eyes, I was again at your mercy. I remembered how scared I was at the moment, but then I also remembered how good your fingers felt inside me. And I couldn´t help myself. You were there again with me. Taking me without my will. And I have to say, that orgasm, what I then got, was something else. And it scared me. A lot." She took a sip from her coffee and continued.
"But then, I knew there was no real danger, since it was you the whole time. And when I closed my eyes again, I saw myself on the bed. Just like I was the first time you stepped into my bedroom. But instead of giving me the key, you made love to me for hours. Fucked me, used me without my consent. And those thoughts took me to another climax. When my head finished spinning, I felt empty. If I had my phone available, I would´ve called you right then and asked you to come and fuck me ´till I pass out. But when I got to my phone, the feeling was gone. And the fear had found its way back to my head again."
I just stared at her. Listening her words. Amazed. She was really something else. But most importantly, she seemed to be ok.
"It took me almost all day to get my head in order. Or so I thought I had done. I was like a spectator in my own mind, following my conflicted emotions in a raging battle inside my head. One part of my brains screamed for me to delete your number from my phone, and forget you for good. But the other part fought back. It told me how good it had all felt and how I was craving you to punish me for being a bad girl. I thought I was losing my mind." So, I wasn´t that bad judge of a character after all.
"When I woke up this morning, I kept thinking back of everything we had been through the past year. At some point it was clear to me. I knew it had to happen at some point. My own actions had lead me to that situation. I was going to keep playing my games until someone would stop it. One way or the other. I now know I had it coming. At first I was disappointed, that you, after all we had been through, were the one to be stopping me. But then again, the thought of you, taking me, using me, got me back to my dream world. " At that point I saw her slipping her left hand under the table and after couple seconds she showed me two very wet fingers. "Look at this", she said, "look what you do to me. All you need to do is to sit there in front of me, and I´m already soaking wet. What have you done to me?" It was now my time to talk, and hers to listen.
"The first time I walked to your bedroom, and saw you on your bed, I was living my fantasy. It was a dream come true for me. I had been fantasizing for a customer like you, stuck in her own bounds, and ready for me to use as I wish. But I´m not that kind of guy. I could never rape anyone. Even if I was sure she wouldn´t recognize me. That´s why it is called fantasy." She was again staring the table desk, sobbing.
"During this past year, I have been studying you. Your reactions. Your emotions. When having sex or just talking. Every time we had been together in the past, it has been a lesson for me. And every time I was sure I had learned something new about you. So I thought to give you what I thought you were craving. And now, after hearing what you just told me, was I really wrong? Every time when you were tied up, helpless, you were so fucking wet, that I thought if I put my face in use, I would drown in your juices. And when I twisted your nipple or spanked your ass, after the immediate feeling of pain went away, your body and face just asked for more." I took a moment, watching her reactions, and thinking what to say next.
"Your body obviously tries to tell you something. And if you want my advise, I would recommend you to listen what it tries to tell you. The fact that you are now dripping, might have nothing to do with me sitting here. Or it might have everything to do with it. Only your body knows that."
"Maybe it tries to tell you that there is still something what it craves. To be used. Roughly. Unwillingly. But with the last, I can´t help you. If you need someone to rape you, just to fulfill your dreams and desires, I´m not the guy for that. Even last time I was going to show my face to you and look how you react, before sticking my cock in you. I wanted you to get the experience, and as close to the real one, as I can do, without being a real rape. I want you to know, that hurting you was never in my mind. Though I must admit, I had my own agenda too. Things were going the same path month after month. I wanted to spice the game up a little too." Her sobbing had stopped and she was drying her eyes. She looked at me and obviously noticed my waiting gaze.
"I do believe you, and I now understand why you did what you did. And for that, I´m even more grateful to you, for all you have done. And maybe that´s why I freaked out. I knew deep down that you couldn´t do that, but when things went on, I started to believe your words. You were quite convincing. Now when I think it again, I should´ve known from your touch. It was firm, but never too rough. I doubt a real rapist would care how he treats his prey." Her reply made me smile. "You can´t imagine how pleased I was, when I heard what you said. You knew I wouldn´t do that, you said it yourself then. Or yelled."
That broke the ice. In a blink of an eye, she was herself again. Tears were gone, and she even had a little smile on her face. I wondered, how she does that. Is there on/off switch somewhere she can control her emotions? Yeah, women are skillful rapid mind changers, but that happened too fast. But maybe it was nothing. She stood up and told me to wait. She went upstairs, and stayed there about 5 minutes. When she came back, she had her hands behind her back. I thought she must be joking, did she slip herself to cuffs, but no. She had something for me in both hands.
First she showed her left hand. There she had a plastic bag with my toys, which I bring with me, in it. She had that mysterious smile on her face again. "You forgot these. You can ditch the voice changer, but whatever you do, don´t throw the crop or the flogger away."
Next she showed her right hand. Again, unsealed envelope. So that´s what took her so long. She came to hug me, and stuffed it in my back pocket. "I have some office duties for tonight left. Do not open until you are home." She told me she would call me Friday, she needed couple days to herself.
When I got home, I almost shred the letter in a hurry. I wanted to see what she wrote this time. I have to admit, after my first amazement went by, I wasn´t that surprised what I found. Once again there was one folded piece of paper, like so many times before, but what was between got my attention. There were both keys to her handcuffs. Or just handcuffs, but I bet they were for hers. The letter was a bit longer this time.
I give these keys to You to show my trust in You. You might have guessed already, they are the only two keys for my handcuffs.
Those keys come with a function. When, or if, You want to try again, just a phone call, and I will be waiting for you.
Just like I was waiting for You on our first night.
You gave me a lot to think, and I am sure we will work this out. But now, please wait for my call first.
Chapter 2: Discoveries
I had to read the letter three times before putting it away. What she meant? To try again? Did she mean that when I was ready to rape her, just a phone call and I could? No, I made it very clear, that I wasn´t going to do that. Or did she try to tell me she wants to keep going like we used to? I don´t think so. Without something new or added, it would not last.
Or was it an invitation? An invitation to really take control? To fuck her as rough as I could? Possible.
Or could it be something else? Not to mention what. Maybe she will tell me if she calls Friday.
Friday came, and 7pm did her call.
"Hello Harry. Once again, I ask you to come over. I´d like to talk face to face, if you don´t mind."
"Now? Sure. Nothing much to do anyway. 30 minutes and I´m there."
"Perfect. I´ll make you some fuel by then." She meant my drug of choice, coffee.
I went to her house, and she asked me to come in. She had placed some snacks for us at the living room, with the coffee of course. She looked like she was excited, like she had something important to tell me. "Come on." She took a hold from my wrist, and started to pull me towards living room.
"Let´s have something to eat first, and then I have something I need to ask you."
I didn´t know what to say, and I was sure she wouldn´t tell me if I asked, so "Ok. First coffee, then talk." would have to do.
After we finished, she started to tell me about her idea.
"I have been thinking this a lot. Believe me, this is not one moments thought. And I have been afraid how you will react, when I ask you this."
Looked like she was gathering her thoughts. "Go on." She looked straight to my eyes and dropped the bomb.
"I would like you to make my decisions for me. For a specific, mutually agreed time. And with rules. Could you think yourself doing so?"
Now the meaning of the keys was clear to me. She would of course give me some time to think, and when, or if, I decided to accept her offer, she would be just a phone call away.
"You mean something like full time master/slave thing? I´m not sure I would be comfortable with that. Could you be more specific?" She knew I wasn´t going to give her a straight yes or no answer, and she started to open up her plan.
"Well yes. And no. Kind of. I don´t mean anything like you beating the shit out of me every time when I don´t do exactly as you have ordered. What I mean is, I would be there when you want me to be. Or when you need me to be. If you tell me to sit by your side and shut up, I would do so".
"If you tell me to suck your cock, maybe I´m not in a mood at that moment, but I still do it. And I will try to do as you say, as well as I can. I want you to do decisions like when I eat. Or when I sleep. If you want to put me in a cage, we will get here one and you can do so. Though I don´t prefer you doing that, but it would be up to you. If you don´t need me, or just don´t want my company, I would prefer it to be my free time. To do for example my needs, maybe even some shopping. But if you needed me, just a word and I would be there. Regardless of what I am doing. And sex. Well, again I would do just as you ask. Of course I would normally prefer to have at least something to say about when we would have sex, but basically you could take me any time you want. I won´t go into every little detail now, those can be discussed later. And I don´t expect you to answer me now, but when you have an answer, call me. Not before. But I bet you now have something you want to ask."
It wasn´t a warhead with atomic load, but it was a bit of a shock to me. She was really offering me keys to control her life.
"I don´t know where to start. First, what comes to mind, is do you expect me to come here after work and keep you in order the rest of the day? And free days all day?" Now she talked to me, like a true business woman.
"No. I would expect you to move in here with me, for the time. If you want, and you can arrange it, you can stop working, and stay with me as much as you want. Your choice. I can pay you your monthly salary, what you get now from taxi. I take care all the other expenses."
Wow. I wonder how long she had planned this. She offers me control, but the situation looks like she is giving all the orders.
She definitely was prepared. "Ok, the next thing at this point would be the time. How long you expect me stay in here with you?"
Again, something what she had an answer for already.
"That, I thought long time. What would be suitable for both? Maybe three months at start? We could agree, let´s say, after first week, then after first month, to have a conversation about how we both see things, and should we continue.
If we both feel comfortable, and you have the chance, we could expand it to maybe a year. And we will agree what would be the safe word, which will, if repeated twice, end our game. Sounds fair?"
"The last question for now will be, when you need the answer?"
"At the latest, by the end of next week. Sunday, 9pm. You think you would have a decision by then?" Yes, this was just like business negotiation.
"Maybe even sooner. I should be going now, but when I call you next time, I will have an answer."
I stood up, and started my way out, when she put her hands around my neck, kissed me and whispered "You can start thinking tomorrow, tonight we can just have fun. No games. I just want you inside me again. And fast."
That being said, she started to rip my clothes off, and I did the same to her. It was primal lust between us. We rolled on her divan, tangled to each other. It didn´t matter if I was inside her or not. Just pure lust.
Next morning when I got back home, my head was spinning. She had to be planning this for a long time. But for how long? Well, looked like she had this planned pretty well. If I would do this, it would have to be all or nothing. Nothing less at this point would do. If I worked at the time, it would feel like being a strict family father, without the kids and the dog of course. Then a sudden thought made me laugh. 'In one way, I would be a male prostitute.'
It took me six days to make up my mind. I thought the hi´s and lo´s, what could be ahead. And in the end, there were more hi´s than lo´s, so I decided to accept her offer. That only if we agreed the rules. I quit my job, there would be employers in need of a driver basically all the time, so I wasn´t worried about work. It had started to bore me anyways.
Next Thursday evening I called her to tell her my answer. I should´ve guessed already, she didn´t like to hear it through the phone, so I went to her place. Actually I had made plans ready, and I hoped she would like what I had in mind.
When I got there, she was standing by the door, obviously eager to hear my answer, and she basically dragged me in. Again, we went to living room to discuss. Janica broke the silence.
"I guess you have something to say to me?" When I looked her, and realized she had put some effort on her appearance for the occasion, I just had to compliment her.
"Yes, I do. First, you look absolutely beautiful. Wow. Very hot." Ha. I made her blush. Now there was something I had not seen before. Without physical activities, at least.
"And as for the offer, if we can come to an agreement about rules, and everything else concerned, I would be honored to share this road with you. I would try my best to guide you, and make the decisions concerning you, always be what I think is best for you."
Her eyes were just shining. I was willing to do, what she asked.
She had found some sort of slave contract from internet, and modified it to suit our situation better. We agreed to make first day of every month to be our check up talk. First thing in the morning. First month we would have weekly talk, every Monday morning. We would talk about how we felt the situation, what maybe could be done differently. That way we would both get something out of it. We agreed the safe word too. If either one of us, at any point, at any situation, repeated twice 'timer release', the game would be over.
Then it was time to decide when to start. "When do you want to start?", I asked her, but already guessing the answer. I saw her slight squirming when we went through the contract.
She almost instantly said "How about right now?" and started to draw the date in the contract.
Well, I´m the one who is free to do as I want, so why not. "I have no plans made."
We signed two copies each, one for both. I went to put my copy to my jacket pocket, and by the time I got back, Janica had moved to kitchen. She didn´t react, until it was too late.
I walked behind her and took a firm grab from the hair at the back of her head, pulled slightly back and turned her face towards mine. "Is this what you want?" I started to push her to stairs, and before stepping on them, made her look at me again. "Let´s see if I can make some dreams come true."
I tried to look as cold as I could, but a little smile gave my intensions wide in the open.
We kept the game rolling about ten months, until I heard the phrase "Timer release, timer release". We were getting too deep into our characters, and Janica said the safe words.
"This is too much, I want this game to stop right now." And the game was over. We both knew, that going back won´t be easy way either, but that was the prize of that game.
I had kept my own apartment the whole time, and started to pack some of my things. I had quite a lot stuff there already, so I had to come for the rest later.
We both needed the space, so it was clear I should be going home. Next day she arranged the delivery service to bring my stuff to me.
A week later, I got a letter from her.
These last two years have been the most educating time in my life. I have learned many new sides from myself, and with Your guidance my life found its new direction. Our journey together taught me humility and self control, amongst many other things. I learned to listen to my body, and my mind knows now how to process its messages. But I don´t think I could´ve done all this without Your patience with me.
There were many occasions, when I thought our way had come to its end, because I couldn´t give You what You wanted. And because I was just thinking of my own pleasure. But You saw through me. There is still one thing You don´t know, and I will try to explain it next.
About five years ago, my actions in business world had lead me to a situation, where I was practically running three different companies, without my name visible anywhere. From the shadows, so to speak. And back then, I was very different person. I was mean, ruthless. I used any means necessary to get what I wanted. And I was successful.
If someone turned against me, I just threw them under the bus, figuratively speaking. And never looked back. I didn´t feel a thing if someone lost everything because of something I did.
But one Saturday evening woke me up. I was sitting in a bar with my oldest friend, and she gave me a lecture. She knew almost everything what I had done so far, and wanted to get my feet back on the ground again. She told me she thinks I despise people around me, and how I cared only about myself. And the way I treated people was not the way I should continue. Some day it might backfire. And it almost did.
Then I knew I had to change my behavior. I somehow had to learn how to respect people again. The way I lived my life had to change. My research lead me to a BDSM website. There were articles and stories, and very soon I found myself reading more and more tales about submissive way of life.
After a while, I knew that would be my way to humanity again. I wanted someone to take full control of my actions. I wanted, no, needed someone to show me how it feels to lose control of your own life. I knew how it feels to command, but to be a leader, first you must learn how to follow. I needed to experience those feelings myself, to be a better person in the future.
You were not the first one, who found me tied up "helpless". One middle aged lady once found me, but she got scared, opened my cuffs and soon left. Didn´t hear from her since. I wasn´t that helpless, as it may seemed. I always had a backup plan. I´m not stupid, you know. I wasn´t going to just jump in to some sadistic train.
My helplessness was just an act. My friend knew exactly what I was doing, and was coming to check me up a little later, if she didn´t hear from me. And I also had hidden security cameras all over the house, just in case. I knew there were still risks, but I was willing to take them to achieve my goal.
First six months those cameras recorded everything what happened in the house. By then I was sure I could trust You enough to stop recording. I promise, no one have ever seen any of those recordings, including myself, and they are now all deleted.
By now You must be thinking that if our journey started from a lie, was any of it true? Yes and no. The first six months was more or less an act. I had it all planned, almost to every little detail. But when I felt I can trust you, I somehow, maybe subconsciously threw myself in to the game. I wanted to play, and see how far I can get. And I let myself grow feelings for You, I wanted You to be the one who leads me back on track. And maybe now, You can understand why I did what I did.
The day we discussed about what happened when You trapped me, was the turning point. Those things You said to me then were the missing piece of a puzzle. You said you had studied me and my actions. As I was Yours.
After that short speech, I knew I was ready, and willing, to give You the keys to my life. And by the form of those cuff keys, I did. I wanted to give You the power to decide what was best for me.
That same friend, who gave me the life changing lecture, made this all possible. You might have wondered how I had more and more free time as time went by. Like I said before, she knew almost everything about me and my businesses, and she held the strings in her hands, while I was exploring myself with You. And she has been doing great job. But now I am ready to go back where I used to be, but this time I will do things differently, thanks to You.
I will treat people with respect, because that is the way for me to earn theirs. And maybe someday, even their trust. I know I have developed as a person, but I also know I still have much to learn. Learning is a process, a lifelong process.
I hope You learned something new about Yourself too. And I know You did. You did not change as a person, You still are that same warm hearted, caring man you were, when you stepped in to my life. But I have seen Your growing confidence.
These last weeks helped you to make decisions, even if You knew you wouldn´t like the outcome, by forcing You to do them. The last couple days, the time I was totally under your control, as your slave, woke me up. It was time to end the game.
I don´t know how long I could´ve lived that way, perhaps not too long, but it felt the game had started to control us, and not the other way round, as it is supposed to be. So it was time to blow the whistle and stop the game, before it was too late.
I wish all the good for You, and I hope You find what You are looking for. Maybe our paths cross again later, maybe not. And remember, I´m just a phone call away from You.
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