Subject: "A Toy in the Attic"
Did a self bondage and drew a picture of
it. Have some thoughts on thrills, too.
Self-bondage really has many separate
(1) Planning the bondage - where and how to set up, a
time when no one will discover you, or maybe when someone might, what toys to
use, how to dress (or undress), what release mechanism(s) will be used.
Thinking about it ahead of time can get me excited.
(2) Setting up -
preparing the location, clothing or costume, setting the timer, hurrying into
position (or savoring the time spent), attaching everything in place.
(3) Passing the point of no return - tying, knotting, chaining, locking,
or somehow irrevocably securing all points of restraint up to that last click of
the lock, wondering if you should or shouln't go through with it, and finally
securing that last item, beyond which the only thing you can do is wait, secured
helplessly, possibly humiliatingly, in inescapable restraint until such time as
your release mechanism is available.
(4) Testing your bonds -
straining within your bondage, realizing that you are bound and cannot escape
until it's time, thinking of all the thousand things which could go wrong and
why have you done this to yourself.
(5) Moment of release - that ice
finally melts, the timer finally goes off, you have wriggled successfully to the
knife, key, or whatever, and you can free yourself, savoring the moment,
thinking that just because you can, do you have to release yourself immediately,
or are you in such pain and/or discomfort or in jeopardy of discovery that you
must release yourself as quickly as possible.
(6) Remembering - how
did it feel, what did you think, will you do it differently next time.
(7) Telling others - in letters such as this one, stories on the
"A Toy in the Attic"
I knew that I wanted to be bound and
gagged in the attic, a.k.a. "po' boy's sauna." It's hot and dry
up there, and no one can see me. What tools (toys) would I use? How
would I release myself? In what position could I restrain myself which I
had not been able to use in the bedroom? Would suspension or
semi-suspension be possible? Would I remember to drink enough liquid
beforehand so that I wouldn't pass out from dehydration?
The attic bondage drawing
First, what should
I wear? I picked up a tight blue spandex swimsuit (from a yard sale), and
put it on over my chastity device (see previous letter), which I had been
wearing all afternoon. Before pulling the straps over my shoulders, I
attached nipple clamps. The swimsuit, which fits like the proverbial
glove, would press those clamps to my skin, preventing their coming off.
Dang, that pinches! My balls are a tad uncomfortable, too, but my
penis is encased in a small bent pvc pipe within the supporter cup. A ring
around my genitals pushes up through a slot in the cup, where a brass lock
secures it. It won't come off without the key. A penis gag, actually
a Doc Johnson butt plug shaped like a very realistic (and LARGE) penis goes into
my mouth, strapped tightly around my head by an old belt. It's not coming
out until I unhook the belt.
How will I be secured? At the apex
of the roofline, where two wooden supports intersect, reinforced by metal plate,
I have wound around a length of super sturdy chain, hooked by a snapring, which
also hooks through an eyebolt I have installed. The chain dangles to the
floor of the attic, with about two feet extra lying on the floor. About
halfway up, I have padlocked a pair of handcuffs to the chain. On the
floor itself, there is a two-by-four, about two and a half feet long, with
eyebolts on each end, and a snapring through each eyebolt. This will be a
spreader bar for my cuffed ankles. A bungee cord is wrapped around one of
the support beams, with a snapring through it. A long, black rope is tied
to the middle of my homemade spreader bar, and passed up through the chain at
the top of the roofline. Two ends dangle, each about ten feet long.
What about release? Ice. In a knee-high stocking, I have
placed eight large pieces of ice, which prevent the ring holding all the keys
from dropping. Attached to that ring is a sturdy cord, which is tied to
the chain near the roofline. When bound, I will be unable to reach the
cord, but, as the ice melts enough for the ring to slip around the hose, the
keys will fall right next to the dangling chain, where my handcuffed hands can
I am set. Attaching my feet to the spreader bar, I
kneel so that my back is to the dangling chain. I bring it up through my
crotch and stretching to reach, I hook it to the snapring on the bungee
cord. Sitting back, I feel the chain press into my ass. I pass the
dangling black ropes in front of me, one on each side of my chastity cup,
through my crotch and up the crack of my ass, tying it to the chain at my
back. Whether I rock forward or backward, when the chain goes slack, the
rope goes taut, and vice versa. My ass feels them both, and my balls are
starting to burn. I try to comfort myself by pulling on my chastity cup,
and can only find marginal relief. Sexual relief, in the form of an
orgasm, is, of course, impossible. My nipples have been stinging for a
while, now, clamped as they are, and are further pained by the black ropes
pressing against my chest. I look to my right, where the ice seems to be
melting and the dripping is constant. I hope I have used enough ice.
I reach back to cuff my left hand, needing to steady myself a bit with my
right. I will be unable to go anywhere or release myself once the other
hand is cuffed, but I may sway a bit. Reaching around with my right hand,
I hesitate. Can I maintain this uncomfortable position for what looks to
be an hour, given the ice's s l o w progress? I pick up my
safety keys, another keyring, and place the ring around my little finger.
I handcuff my other hand and test my bonds, gently at first.
realize this will be too uncomfortable to maintain (I am chickening out, now,
you see), and release my hands after about ten minutes of grunting and
straining. My knees are sore. Keeping my feet secured to the
spreader bar, I unhook everything else from my body, and lie on my back, using
the rope to raise my feet in the air. I wrap the ends around my knees,
bringing them together, putting a lot of pressure on my groin, and, tie them
off. I am semi-suspended, now, and, again, keeping the chicken keys on my
finger, handcuff both hands to the chain above me. I am still
By the way, sweat is just pouring out of me now, and,
even with the "chicken" keys in hand, am having a harder time
unlocking myself. Although I am as hot as can be, drenched in
perspiration, I look up at the ice, which seems to be the same size as
before. Surely it's melting? By now I realize that this
semi-suspension will be too hard on my back, and release myself again.
Struggling to stand up, I manage to put the chain to my back, the ice release
behind me and out of sight. I must come up with a bondage that I can do,
or all this effort will have done nothing more than prove me a coward. I
pass the chain under my crotch again, this time replacing the location of the
bungee cord so that it is at the junction near the roofline in front of me, the
snapring hanging at eye level. Stretching on tiptoe, I find the shortest length
link to which I can clip the snapring. Settling back, the chain is now
pressed into my asscrack. The black ropes are still dangling from
the apex of the beams, and I wrap them around my face, further securing the gag
to my head, then, wrapping the ropes around the beams, I secure my head to
them. Placing the "chicken" keys on a box next to me, where I
believe they will be within reach of my cuffed hands, I proceed to handcuff
myself to the chain one more time. Now, unless I can reach those keys on
the box to my left, I am now helpless until the ice melts. I am standing,
somewhat precariously and almost on tiptoe, with my legs spread, a chain in my
ass, my groin aching, my balls on fire, and my nipples throbbing. I am
soaked in sweat.
I test my bonds, vigorously, this time, and realize that I
am trapped, but good! Fortunately, my "chicken" keys are within
reach, so I'll just reach over and.....uh, oh! Securing my head to the
rafters has prevented me from reaching anything! Now I must wait for the
ice to melt! How long will that be???
From start to finish,
from setting up the equipment to finally feeling those cold keys slap against my
sweaty ass, we're talking about three hours.
It would be about
another two hours before the wife came home, so I cleaned up my stuff, and
decided to take a bath. I'll tell you about that in the next letter!